RED PANTIES

CAN I ASK YOU SOMETHING PERSONAL?

I was sitting across from him. He was leaned back in his chair, casually diagonal to the table. His position is important. The ocean breeze moving through the patio was warm and had me take my sweater off. I haven’t seen him in years. His hair is now completely gray. Even more handsome. His eyes sparkle when he smiles and it surprises me every time.

I’m telling him what I’ve been up to. “I teach erotic writing. I basically help men and women get in touch with what they desire, so they can know and ask for what they want in sex.”

He lights up. “I could use something like that.”

My mind starts racing, dare I ask?

“Can I ask you something personal?” I inquire with a sparkle in my eye.

“Yes,” he says quickly, still leaning back in his chair.

“You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.” I give him the option to opt out.

“OK,” he responds without a beat.

“What’s something that you want to experience in sex, that you’ve never asked for?” I say looking at him dead in the eye.

He describes a scene. What he would do to this “woman”. Then what he’d like to receive. The eye contact. The intimacy. The slowness. (I’m being intentionally vague because this is a true story & I want to respect part of his privacy… but obviously not all.)

A mental checkmark clicks in my mind. I can do that. I’m a total yes.

We continue our conversation and I’m at a crossroads inside myself. Do I say this now sitting across from him at this table or do I wait, text him later, and see what happens?

“I’m going to say something very forward. I’m fine if you say no.” The words decide to jump ship and leave my lips.

He gives me the go-ahead and I say, “If you ever wanted to have a sexual experience with me, I’d be very open to that.”

He grabs the arms of the chair he is sitting in, picks it up, turns it from diagonal to 100% facing me straight on, looks me dead in the eye, and says, “My cleaning lady is at my house, but I can get her to leave early.”

These are the kinds of things I say after opening my voice through erotic writing.

TAKE A DEEP LISTEN

RED PANTIES

He starts tracing 

the backs of my thighs 

with his fingers

spreading my wrap dress open 

as I spread my legs a tiny bit

red panties

knuckles grazing clit

attention grabbed

eyes on his

he doesn’t look away

and so I don’t

his eyes are green

but brown

layers of color

not just one

is this what hazel looks like

deep color stings 

in a sea of silver hair 

on his face and head

he told me 

to go into the bedroom 

and get undressed

put myself in a position

so that he can walk in 

and be surprised

do you want me naked

he does

I’m a yes 

but I’ll get there soon

first fingers touch the red

that’s covering my pink

and a thick pleasure pressure is growing

my thighs

a world of sensation

and I like the way 

he keeps looking at me

I know that I need to go into the bedroom

and take my clothes off

but he feels irresistible all of a sudden

and I want that mouth on me

black t-shirt and jeans

and I tilt forward

he’s clean 

and I want to kiss

then his hands graze my face

I remember how I start losing myself

when this part of my skin gets touched

thighs… yes 

pussy… yes 

face… yes 

neck… yes

he’s kissing near my ear 

and breath on this part of my body 

makes me feel a little less in control 

my own sound surprise me

as he’s causing chills

in all directions 

we spend some time here

and I feel turned on

I reached down

to feel his cock hard

through his jeans

he has to adjust himself and 

I want my pussy on that thing

I straddle him

his hands are grazing 

my nipples

then shortly 

they’re in my bra 

and we’re kissing 

and he’s sucking 

my nipples

are sensitive

he gives a tug

sucks harder

the best kind of pain

I stroke his cock 

with my red panties

one full tit

and then the other 

in his mouth and hands 

which he clearly knows 

how to handle me

he’s lying back

head propped up

I can easily reach

his mouth with mine

there’s this delighted pressure

and I’m on him

he’s pulling me closer

sucking me in 

hands on my ass 

as I ride his denim masked cock 

and this position 

and this pressure 

and his mouth 

and my tits 

and my sounds 

and my pussy 

turned on

and I say 

something like

this feels like an ideal sex position

because I’m wanting to fuck 

and be contained

I pull in harder

and I feel him coming out to get me

we’re in a micro-wrestle

and the only language is yum 

and this is just the hello 

and I’m gonna be naked soon 

in the bedroom 

with a surprise position

and I love this kind of play

and I’m a yes

and I’m open 

to guidance

direction 

or orders